Say goodbye to the old school, ergh, boring - I hate school!

Say HELLO to the patriot Mcschool of dreams, brought to you in association with Coca-Cola - to ensure your patriot Mcschool dreams have Real magic - providing children with the very best school-like experience and for prices lower than you’d expect.

Yup, I took a large venti in your bathroom

Youd be hard pushed to find many who weren’t

Sex education was a muttered warning about the school janitor

“Wait a minute, are you trying to tell me that the person who’s been going robbin people while wearing a hood is also called Robin Hood and that a real name of a real person and not just British people taking piss?”

*Click clack

You’ve been very naughty this year haven’t you, Brian?

Never before, in human history, has such ruthlessness been so wholesome.

You feel better now?

And it’ll happen to you one day too

100% and you probably know this, so I’m just addin: think of infinity as a sequence of infinite numbers. The number of all the even numbers, that stretch off into infinity, are also infinite. However, that infinite number isn’t as big as regular infinity.

You can have different sizes of infinity because when things get that big, the rules change. Its almost like infinity / 2 = smaller infinity.

Its also exactly the kind of thing you’d expect to read about in the onion.

This is beyond mear irony.

Are you trying to tell me that the spirit of capitalism won’t return to us, dressed in the splendor of new technology, to absolve us of our past planetary transgressions, and take us to a new, perfect place amongst the stars where we will live in profit and harmony for ever?

Well, thats the second time I’ve fallen for that story…

Don’t worry, you can consol yourself with all the great new rock music being made

Tbf, even as someone around the same age as you, I can’t even make my own. Like, purely as a hobby but it all comes out as like stuff from the late 60s and early 70s. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t make the rock/guitar music i grew up with.

I could always drown it in fuzz or hide the guitars, like everyone else these days I guess.

I’m just having a moan. I think its partly the emergance of rap etc. but also a generation traumatised by covid might not be into the same leary, brash rock sounds others might like. I mean, hearing it live with a huge crown thats full of energy makes such a difference. I’m hoping when there’s a higher percentage who experienced it live during those years instead, it might get better.

I’m going for a piss

Oh yeah, want some help with that?

All must be sacrificed for glorious labour, blessed be its name, holiest of holies.

Unfortunately, I can’t read the language it was written in and I can only go with the people we knew and met who could.

No, they mean deathtrap Americans. I think they’re like Irish Americans or African Americans but I’m not too sure where deathtrap is.

I knew a guy who had “bad to the bone” written on his neck in Chinese. The problem is, the phrase doesn’t translate at all.

So, his tattoo read as “my bones are bad”

Tbf, he was a clown and had something like that coming.

Until then, you know, you just have to be true to yourself because, if you’re not being true to yourself, you’ll be living a lie.

In the end you’ve just got to remember that it is what is and you’ve got to what you’ve got to do. You gotta do your thing you, know?

So just be you but a you that’s true to yourself while going with the flow and bossing it your way, all the way.

Most of all, be lucky.

Okay and what if I, believe it or not, actually already knew that they dont pay customers to scan things and wasn’t on Walmart side?