Collections might have been inherited over generations. For some of them, the current owners may not have much interest in what they have and therefore not be aware of some rare copies.

In proper libraries, we probably have the author and title in a database somewhere but not the content. In private collections, all bets are off.

I would assume that almost any old library or private collection that includes old handwritten books has at least a couple of manuscripts that nobody has read in decades if not centuries.

We’re talking about the same event, aren’t we?

Big university in Germany that’s well-known for their computer science department. Started in 2008 and took way longer than planned. As stated in my other comment, being openly trans was rare when I started but had become more common by the time I got my degree, especially among new students who took the chance to make new friends who never knew their pre-outing personas.

So they see you as a human. Not a gay human.

On the Internet, nobody knows you’re a dog

From personal experience, I would say it’s a phenomenon of the last… maybe 10 years, at least in Germany. When a friend of mine started university in about 2010, I think she was the only openly trans person out of 300 first semester computer science students. These days, when you go to a Chaos Computer Club event, it’s full of pride flags and queer people dressed in skirts, striped programmer socks and cat ear headbands. In the opposite direction, free tampons for trans-masc people in the men’s bathrooms are just… normal.

For a while this caused a bit of friction, not because people were outright anti-queer or anti-trans but because they felt it had gotten so extreme that their queer-welcoming computer nerd event had turned into a pride event which just happened to include a few people with laptops. Now everyone seems to get along though.

That being said, there have always been gender-nonconforming people in IT and gaming. As an arbitrary example, Rebecca Heineman is a trans-woman who taught herself how to pirate and reverse-engineer Atari 2600 games in the 1970s, became the first (US) national video gaming champion in 1980, worked at a gaming magazine, co-founded Interplay Productions, worked on many well-known games. It’s just that being trans wasn’t as accepted back then so a lot of them chose not to out themselves, which honestly can’t be good for one’s mental health.

As we said back in university: “If we have too few women in our field, we will make our own.”

Not sure about the best overall but one of my favorite karaoke memories is a metalhead friend of mine performing Weird Al - White & Nerdy.

Very interesting history and culture, plastered over with bland authoritarian turbo-capitalism that disguises itself as communism.

Remind me… is that the same UK that currently tries to force apple and google to include governement backdoors into their encryption?

I wrote both my bachelor’s and master’s thesis to Watch The Skies from Skyrim on loop. Yes, the same track all day for weeks.

Important note: this is about quantum teleportation. They transferred data between two quantum computers without a cable or wifi. Teleporting matter, let alone matter in useful quantities is far off.

With the trend to make ever larger but thinner phones, we’ll eventually end up with an A3 sheet of paper. I just want the 5/5S/SE1 or Mini form factor back. I don’t care about thin phones, only about being able to use the whole screen with one hand.

I have a wishlist that I share with my family and close friends. People follow that list unless they have an idea that they’re 100% sure about. I think the only times I got an unwanted gift was things I already had. Either because something went wrong coordinating between people (rare, everyone knows they can contact my partner to ask what’s still available) or because they accidentally bought the wrong thing (like the first book of a series instead the second one).

The only exception ever was during a single https://givin.gifts/ secret santa exchange where someone at the same time a) completely ignored my profile, b) gifted something below the stated minimum value, c) didn’t wrap my gift, d) didn’t include a card and e) didn’t include any packing material. They just threw a random 5€ item from the supermarket into an unpadded box and called it a day.

German here, we have the same thing (du vs. sie). Our rules may be slightly different than dutch but probably similar enough.

Police: definitely formal unless the officer is someone you know privately.

Shop: usually formal though some hobby-related shops (think GameStop or board games) might prefer informal.

Campsite: probably informal

As a general rule of thumb: informal is used with first names, formal is used with last names. Think about which name you would use in English and go with that. If in doubt, use the formal version or ask.

Never said that, never meant that.

When I said “inner child” I meant his own capability of leaving his adult responsibilities behind for a while in favor of doing things that society as a whole deems childish. Indulging in certain hobbies, acting a certain way. I can’t find the right English word right now. In German we might call it being “unbeschwert”, so maybe “unburdened”.

I was specifically replying to the passage that he should have spent those 13 years in age difference growing as a person to an extent that he shouldn’t have much in common with a 16-year old anymore. And to that I ask: why? Must every adult be a joyless, mindless worker drone who can’t enjoy the things they enjoyed when they were 16? I’m happy to discuss if the relationship OP described might be problematic because of a power dynamic and that’s been done to death in this thread. But saying he isn’t allowed to feel connected to someone younger than him based on shared interests or a need to escape his adult responsibilities for a while feels bitter and judgemental.

None of this has anything to do with me labeling anyone as an actual child.

Edit: Maybe a picture says more than a thousand words so let me link to my favorite XKCD: https://xkcd.com/150/

From my personal experience this “ought to be” is the problem. Once you get your first job, everyone expects you to drop everything that you’re passionate about and start behaving like an adult. That can be overwhelming and I wouldn’t judge anyone for wanting to keep that cozy feeling of being young for a bit longer. And as long as all important responsibilities still get taken care of, why not let adults be as childish as they want, whenever they want?

Oh, don’t get me wrong. It is a bit weird and concerning. But weird and concerning alone are not enough to stop something that’s legal and at least for now seems to work pretty well. And like you said, not much they can do about it. The best course of action is to deal with it, be as accepting and supportive as they can and be prepared to help if things do go wrong. Everything else will make things worse.

So let me summarize:

• He is happy
• She is happy
• He is very open about it and introduced her to you
• She is everything you could wish for (except her age)
• Her parents are aware that she’s dating someone older and are fine with it
• It’s legal
• He doesn’t have a history of abusive relationships
• They have at least some shared interests

And yet you still can’t give this relationship a chance based on the vague feeling that you “just think it’s inappropriate”?

While I agree that an age gap this big - especially if one is only 16 - is a red flag and should be watched carefully, you’re against it for all the wrong reasons. As long as she is safe and they are both happy, give them a chance. Be prepared to step in if - and only if - there are signs of either of them being taken advantage of. Otherwise, support them the same way you would support them if she was ten years older. As long as everything stays healthy and legal, nothing you could say would make them reconsider their relationship. Criticism will only lead to him not telling you about his life anymore. To you not noticing if something does go wrong. To him not feeling comfortable breaking up with her when they are not happy anymore. To her not being comfortable breaking up with him when they are not happy anymore.

Approach this carefully and with empathy. Everything else will alienate you from your son and might drive him to bad decisions.