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yeah but he’s the size of Larry Bird and he sucks at hiding

my wife insists on trying cheaper brands and then telling me they’re just as good.

i do most of the shopping now.

If you see 1 roach, there’s probably 1,000 more hiding. If you see 1,000 roaches…

Bounty paper towels.

Everything else is a fucking waste of paper.

I’m hoping that whoever created this comment realizes that the meme-maker probably used that line as a joke, and it’s not a serious sentiment.

Only if you keep every door in your house closed 24/7 like a psychopath

How about you give them a little privacy