DefiantBidet

I hadn’t thought of that. Where I live if you have no intent on repairing the marriage, divorce not separate

It’s not a bizarre opinion it’s a thing I have been through. While it depends on state where I live if you don’t have any intention on repair don’t separate go to divorce

I think it is immoral. The point of separation is to allow time to repair the relationship. Having extra relations during the time meant to focus on repairing the main relationship is cheating. Full stop.

Difficult

data… dad - d + ta

the other way doesn’t bother me though… unlike “experiment”.
it freaks me out when people throw a “spear” in that word

Ever since YouTube started this nonsense I moved to invidious and haven’t looked back

OK this is gonna be a long one. And it’s not even mine. The original point of what I’m about to post was about losing loved ones to death, but in my lowest parts of dealing with my divorce I found these words very helpful. One of the few good things to come out of reddit. Credit to reddit user GSnow. Here goes.

Alright, here goes. I’m old. What that means is that I’ve survived (so far) and a lot of people I’ve known and loved did not. I’ve lost friends, best friends, acquaintances, co-workers, grandparents, mom, relatives, teachers, mentors, students, neighbors, and a host of other folks. I have no children, and I can’t imagine the pain it must be to lose a child. But here’s my two cents.

I wish I could say you get used to people dying. I never did. I don’t want to. It tears a hole through me whenever somebody I love dies, no matter the circumstances. But I don’t want it to “not matter”. I don’t want it to be something that just passes. My scars are a testament to the love and the relationship that I had for and with that person. And if the scar is deep, so was the love. So be it. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are a testament that I can love deeply and live deeply and be cut, or even gouged, and that I can heal and continue to live and continue to love. And the scar tissue is stronger than the original flesh ever was. Scars are a testament to life. Scars are only ugly to people who can’t see.

As for grief, you’ll find it comes in waves. When the ship is first wrecked, you’re drowning, with wreckage all around you. Everything floating around you reminds you of the beauty and the magnificence of the ship that was, and is no more. And all you can do is float. You find some piece of the wreckage and you hang on for a while. Maybe it’s some physical thing. Maybe it’s a happy memory or a photograph. Maybe it’s a person who is also floating. For a while, all you can do is float. Stay alive.

In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don’t even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float. After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you’ll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function. You never know what’s going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything…and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life.

Somewhere down the line, and it’s different for everybody, you find that the waves are only 80 feet tall. Or 50 feet tall. And while they still come, they come further apart. You can see them coming. An anniversary, a birthday, or Christmas, or landing at O’Hare. You can see it coming, for the most part, and prepare yourself. And when it washes over you, you know that somehow you will, again, come out the other side. Soaking wet, sputtering, still hanging on to some tiny piece of the wreckage, but you’ll come out.

Take it from an old guy. The waves never stop coming, and somehow you don’t really want them to. But you learn that you’ll survive them. And other waves will come. And you’ll survive them too. If you’re lucky, you’ll have lots of scars from lots of loves. And lots of shipwrecks.

• /u/GSnow

YouTube slowing itself down to unusable made me write a local extension that takes any YouTube watch link and opens it in yewtu.be my life has been better since. Fuck you tube’s stance. You’re gonna make the experience terrible I’ll watch your content via another client.

You tried… Sorry just felt you needed at least one sane reply

its an incredibly powerful tool. I’ve seen its usage bloom from simple box health to actually determining cost per month of services. basically going from a “hows our server looking?” to a “we need this tool to achieve our margins”

Bc when entire infra teams rely on your service to operate, and orgs depend on infra, you can charge for that service bc orgs have to pay it, or degrade to cheaper, less robust alternatives - which do exist

Best in class cost $$$

Yup. If you’re lucky you can get pre taxed commuter benefits but that’s not much. My monthly bus pass is more than my credits and that doesn’t included parking or subways

this is awesome - thanks.

Http status 429 is too many requests. It is what the reddit api was responding with hours before they were supposed to

Like most of y’all came over when 429s hit up our beloved RIF. Hoping I can learn how to use this number n a similar way.

As an aside was the API rate limiting done earlier than anticipated? Thought it was a 7/1 thing and not a 6/30 @ 10p EST thing.