I once twisted a nerve in my shoulder by sitting down wrong in the bus.
Out of honest curiosity, is “twisted a nerve” a real diagnosis and a meaningful one, or is it just a colorful way to say you fucked something up in your shoulder?
I’ve had something that my Dr and the physical therapists called a “pinched nerve” but I understand that basically means “we don’t know but assume it’s something to do with a nerve because we think we can rule out all the stuff we understand better”.
A pinched nerve is a real diagnosis, in that you generally know what happened. But unless there are other red flag symptoms you don’t look for the actual cause, because it’s really difficult and it only takes two to three days to recover. Usually a symbol of underdeveloped muscles in your back.
On day 3 of a meth bender, non-stop looking at and Photoshopping porn, paralyzed my ulnar nerve by the way my arm was resting on the armrest. Yes, I sat there that long in the same position. Couldn’t feel my pinkie and ring finger for a couple of years. No, I haven’t done meth in 20 years.
Sliced my forearm open trying to make a small scratch to do a blood brother thing with my gf. My god, I barely got it to stop bleeding. Now I have what looks like a suicide scar. In other news, I was top-tier at sharpening pocket knives back then.
Hit a brick wall, head on, driving my motorcycle drunk, on an unfamiliar street, at night, wearing dark goggles. The bike exploded into fragments, I got a light concussion.
Broke my femur, most crippling injury to date. Knew my motorcycle brakes were far too worn, drove it anyway. Lady slammed her brakes, guy in front of me did same, I tried to do the same, rammed him from behind.
Using a non-locking pocket knife to trim a washer hose. It folded and cut me to the bone, had to have surgery to repair the extensor tendon. Also using a non-locking pocket knife to work on my motorcycle throttle cable, you guessed it, it folded and cut me to the bone. Have had nerve damage in that fingertip since.
Riding my BMX as a kid, decided to try an endo. Slammed the front brakes at speed with predictable results. Knee hit the asphalt to hard it mashed the skin off. Still got the scar, which matches the one on my other knee from swinging over a lava rock.
Got diverticulitis, 3 times, most painful events of my life. Spent years shitting too hard, developed diverticulosis (little tears/pouches in your intestine that catch food and get infected). Surgery fixed it!
Popped a lung after a night of rigorous sex. Yes, I smoked cigarettes and weed. Also, had a lawn service where I inhaled dust all day. Maybe not so much on me though. Doc said it was common among young men and I had two friends blow a lung in those years.
Lately, my feet have been all fucked up from working at Lowe’s (I rage quit BTW). Got some new shoes at the thrift, like walking on clouds. Apparently been wearing a size too small for years.
Bruised/broken my ribs several times, broke my right arm twice, countless broken toes and fingers, and perhaps more than the one concussion described above. At this point in the story I’ve stopped counting scars.
I can keep going. No idea how I survived my 20s without permanent injury or prison time.
bruh holy shit
You have lived a very full life in a very short time. What are your plans for your retirement (basically anything after right now)?
Meh, I’m a GenX slacker, total failure. My best guess is I’ll retire to the Philippines with my Filipino wife, see what social security gets me while I rent my Florida house for something fair. Really want to keep the house for my kid’s inheritance, or if I croak, my wife’s home.
Had a spot or two where I thought it was the end of all things, thought, “Well. I’ve burned the candle at both ends. Time to die.”
Dude I know that all of those probably hurt a lot but that sounds like an awesome life.
Dad always said he had been shot, stabbed and blown to hell. Like father, like son.
Burned my face while breathing fire with Everclear.
I broke my toe on a case of ramen noodles.
I used to work nights. When I had the next day off, I would usually stay up all day and go to sleep that evening. So, wake up around 2-4pm Friday, go to at 10pm to 6am Saturday and not sleep until Saturday evening.
This eventually caught up with me. I was riding a bicycle down a hill, just coasting and fell a sleep for a second. Down I went. Need stitches in my head ( I still have a bump), tons of road rash, and banged up my knee.
I recovered fully except for the bump on my head.
I’ve broken my pinky toe twice by stubbing it on furniture corners.
Hmm, I could be wrong, but, I think you were trying to respond to the other comment about hurting their toe.
Lol i meant to reply to the post in general but replied to your comment by mistake. Sorry about that. I’m just gonna leave it lol. Too lazy to fix. Have a good weekend!
I have also broken my pinky twice on the same doorframe on the way from the lunch table to the Xbox 360 in my aunts house. :)
A third time I only sprained it if I remember correctly.
Didn’t keep me from playing on these days though. 😅
In high school I was run over by a car that I was sitting in. Buddy stopped in a parking lot, I started to get out, then he went forward and my foot was caught under the rear tire. I was pulled out of the car and my leg was run over.
Minor tear in a ligament and have a nice scar, but that’s about it.
Many, many moons ago. I rode my Big Wheel standing up, no hands, down hill.
Ended up crashing into a fire hydrant. Ouch. At least a broken right arm from what I remember.
I once cut the inside of my thigh as a kid by bicycle jousting with my friends at night-time along the streets and sidewalks. Slammed into one of my friends’ tires head-on, and got thrown forward into the crossbar. I was lucky I was slightly off-center, but I came away with a nasty bruise, a laceration, and a rip in my shorts.
Wanted to see what happened if I stuck my finger into a pencil sharpener. Didn’t really think that one through
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Stubbed my toe on a cat condo base while running the kitchen. Didn’t think much of it. Next day it hurts like crazy. Fractured it, dislocated it, and tore the ligament.
When I was around 12 I sat crouched on the floor and was hyper focused on drawing. I must’ve sat there for hours with little to no movement and when I got up I couldn’t lift my right foot. I severely damaged a nerve and had to go through weeks of physiotherapy.
I cut a good part of the way through my thumb opening a can of beans
Is this interrupted a Star Trek marathon you were streaming from your Linux server you are hereby Lemmy royalty
Well I was probably streaming from my friend’s Plex server (pre enshitification), which was running on a NAS probably running some flavor of Linux under the hood, and it very well could have been TNG…
So maybe the scar on my thumb is the mark of a royal lemming?
I was cutting slices out of an apple with a comically large Bowie knife.
My roommate said, “Hey, that looks pretty dangerous.”
I said, “Nah, bro, it’s perfectly safe.”
Somewhere around the middle of that sentence, the knife sliced through the apple and into my palm.
He had to drive me to the hospital for stitches.
I shattered my ankle, separated my tibia and fibula, and broke a different part of my fibula. All in one moment. How, you ask? By stepping outside. My dog pulled too hard on her leash and I stumbled and twisted my ankle in just the right way. Got a fancy Maisonneuve fracture that had to be surgically fixed.
